I began my acupuncture regimen last week. I'll be going twice a week for eight weeks (stage 1) and also taking herbal supplements based on my needs. Yesterday was a therapy session. I cried on the acupuncture table not because it hurt (all of you who are like, OH NO it DOES hurt!!) It honestly doesn't hurt at all. Even if some of the needles that go in a little deeper feel uncomfortable going in at first, I never feel any pain and after I'm lying there for about 20 minutes or so I forget the needles are even there. Anyway, I cried because I've been under so much stress and I'm at a real crossroads because I know the cause of my pain and I know I must make changes, but I am scared and I am uncertain. I'm praying for direction and praying God will lead me to the right opportunity at the right time with the right people. I know I deserve better and I know I've got to start somewhere, but it's that first step that can really be a doozy! So dear reader, if you're a praying person, a positive vibe sender, love and light, whatever you call it or however you do it - as long as it's loving, peaceful and positive - please send it my way!
I also apologized to my doc for crying and he was so nice - he actually (because I had needles in my hands and arms) wiped my tears with a tissue and told me that it was a perfectly safe space. He was very caring and kind and he really listened to me. He also told me that that was exactly the place to bring those feelings because it is a place of healing. It was a good session. I left feeling more calm and more quiet, which I love because that is so atypical for me. He also gave me this powder - I have to dissolve it in water three times a day and drink it - I just did it and man is it DISGUSTING. I have to do it for a week and honestly, I'm not excited about it at all. It's just really, really nasty. I cannot describe it, but I think it's gonna be a real test of how much I want to get healed because all I wanted to do was gag. It is supposed to aid with my digestion and my mood. It also is supposedly complimentary to the acupuncture and will help the acupuncture to work even better. We shall see. I'm a tiny bit skeptical, but I'm willing to try it.
I'm willing to try it because I know I've tried a lot of things over the years that haven't worked or only worked short-term or maybe they served their purpose for the time. I think too though, that honestly, I've been participating more in my own sickness, rather than my own health. I think for so long I've focused on problems and hurts and pain...that I didn't know how to do anything else. That is changing now. I'm focusing on solutions, health and happiness. I'm focused on my healing.
What old ways or thoughts are holding you back? How can you begin today to focus on your own healing? I hope my writing inspires and helps. I pray this finds you well.
I'm willing to try it because I know I've tried a lot of things over the years that haven't worked or only worked short-term or maybe they served their purpose for the time. I think too though, that honestly, I've been participating more in my own sickness, rather than my own health. I think for so long I've focused on problems and hurts and pain...that I didn't know how to do anything else. That is changing now. I'm focusing on solutions, health and happiness. I'm focused on my healing.
What old ways or thoughts are holding you back? How can you begin today to focus on your own healing? I hope my writing inspires and helps. I pray this finds you well.
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