People are Disappointing

Full disclosure: I've been sick for a week (still am) and I'm over it.  I'm feeling sad and frustrated.  Everything I listen to and everything I read says it's important to name your feelings - not wallow necessarily - but name them and then deal with them.  Fact is, sometimes, you just aren't going to feel positive.  Sometimes you're going to feel like crap - either physically or emotionally or both.  So this is one of those times.  But I want to write about disappointment right now because that is also what I'm feeling. Maybe someone, anyone out there that reads this might comment and give me some words of wisdom.

I have very high standards for myself and expectations of myself.  I work too hard and I think I've been under the false impression for a long time that if you just work hard enough everything will work out and you can make it work.  There goes the control button again.  I stress internally and brood internally over whether I'm doing enough to make things go the way I want them to.  It's a fine line you walk between understanding you have control over things and getting up and doing something about stuff, and then of course, surrendering to the fact that you have little control over most things.

The biggest thing you have zero control over is other people.  I am in a current state of disappointment with a few people because I have had expectations of how I think they should behave.  I think to myself, well, this is how I would behave in this situation or circumstance or this is the "right" thing to do - so these people should do that.  Problem is, not everyone sees things the way I see them.  Not everyone even is aware enough of their own behaviors to know that they might be doing or saying something that others may perceive as offensive or out of line.

Examples - you're not invited to something you think you should be. A "loved one" isn't involved in your life and doesn't make an effort to be.  Someone consistently talks down to you or in a condescending tone and frequently feels the need to tell you what to do - despite the fact that you already know exactly what to do.   You feel certain friends or family members should support your business or personal endeavors in a certain way, but they don't. 

So people are disappointing - does that mean you change your expectations?  Maybe that's the answer. Have no expectations and you won't be disappointed.  Easier said than done I think. Real issue I'm having though is how to let them know how I feel or what I'm thinking about their behavior or if I even should.  I think boundaries are important and I think being open and honest is important, but sometimes I think weighing the importance of it is also good - like is anything really going to change because you said something?   Maybe that shouldn't be the goal?  Maybe the goal should be to just let people know how you feel in the most loving of ways - if the relationship is worth it to you?  I think the trouble is I want to honor and acknowledge my own feelings too and give others an opportunity to at least be aware of my feelings and maybe they'll respond kindly or even by changing,  As I stated in my opening comment - any and all helpful, kind words of wisdom are welcome.

In the meantime - your prayers, thoughts, positive energy for speedy recovery sent my way would surely be welcomed.  Peace be with you on your own journey!